In today’s fast-paced world, technical skills may help you land a job, but emotional intelligence (EQ) determines how far you go. Whether you’re managing a team, building relationships, or navigating personal challenges, EQ plays a critical role in your ability to succeed and thrive.
George Stern’s insightful infographic highlights 16 core areas of emotional intelligence, each with a simple “Do” and “Don’t” that can dramatically shift how you connect with others. Let’s break down these key principles and understand how you can apply them in daily life.
1. Active Listening
- Do: Make eye contact, face the person, and ask clarifying questions.
- Don’t: Focus on what you’re going to say next and miss the point. Why it matters: Listening is about presence, not just hearing. Active listening builds trust.
2. Empathy
- Do: Strive to understand the emotions of others.
- Don’t: Jump to conclusions or assume without asking. Why it matters: Empathy creates deeper connections and dissolves misunderstandings.
3. Self-Awareness
- Do: Reflect on how your actions affect others.
- Don’t: Act without considering your emotional impact. Why it matters: Self-awareness is the cornerstone of emotional growth and maturity.
4. Emotional Awareness
- Do: Observe tone, body language, and energy in the room.
- Don’t: Ignore nonverbal cues or fail to adapt. Why it matters: Reading between the lines often reveals more than words can say.
5. Feedback
- Do: Provide honest, constructive feedback.
- Don’t: Avoid feedback thinking you’re being kind. Why it matters: Growth comes from truth, not silence.
6. Input
- Do: Ask for feedback and be open to it.
- Don’t: Get defensive or ignore it. Why it matters: Welcoming feedback fosters continuous improvement.
7. Initiative
- Do: Be a self-starter and find internal motivation.
- Don’t: Wait for external motivation or direction. Why it matters: Initiative leads to innovation and progress.
8. Teamwork
- Do: Collaborate and share credit.
- Don’t: Hoard information or take all the credit. Why it matters: Great teams thrive on trust and mutual respect.
9. Diplomacy
- Do: Respect different views and seek common ground.
- Don’t: Dismiss or belittle others. Why it matters: Diplomacy builds bridges instead of walls.
10. Mindfulness
- Do: Stay present and self-aware.
- Don’t: Dwell on the past or future. Why it matters: Mindfulness strengthens focus and emotional regulation.
11. Gratitude
- Do: Appreciate others and celebrate wins.
- Don’t: Underestimate the power of a thank you. Why it matters: Gratitude nurtures positivity and boosts morale.
12. Adaptability
- Do: Embrace change with flexibility.
- Don’t: Rely on old ways just because they’re familiar. Why it matters: Adaptability is key to resilience and relevance.
13. Conflict Resolution
- Do: Address conflicts constructively and directly.
- Don’t: Avoid difficult conversations. Why it matters: Healthy conflict leads to clarity and progress.
14. Influence
- Do: Understand what drives others.
- Don’t: Rely solely on authority or commands. Why it matters: Influence is more effective when it’s rooted in empathy and insight.
15. Emotional Control
- Do: Pause and think before reacting.
- Don’t: Let emotions lead to regretful actions. Why it matters: Emotional regulation prevents unnecessary damage and promotes respect.
16. Sociability
- Do: Be warm and open to connection.
- Don’t: Dismiss the value of small interactions. Why it matters: Even small moments of connection build lasting bonds.
Final Thoughts
Emotional intelligence isn’t about being perfect—it’s about being intentional. These simple do’s and don’ts can transform the way you engage with the world, making you a more effective leader, teammate, friend, and human being.
Which of these areas do you feel strong in? Which ones are growth opportunities for you?
Let’s all keep learning, evolving, and showing up with heart.